Why Aren't Parents Buying Limos Instead of Minivans?

On a pretty regular basis I dream about driving a limo. Can you just imagine how amazing that would be as a parent? I'm going to lay out the pros and cons so we can all make a practical decision about this:

Pros

  • It's basically a nap-mobile with all that carpet space

  • Our string cheese habit could be comfortably transported in the mini-fridge

  • The kids could drink milk from champagne flutes

  • There's a magical button that makes a barrier appear between me and my kids saying stupid shit like, "Mom look, my elbows disappeared."

  • Crack the windows in the back and my kids have a playroom while I'm in spin class

  • With all that space in the back I could easily separate the kids when they're trying to wipe boogers on each other

  • The tinted windows and sunroof would make for a pretty sexy date night

  • Two words: Preschool Prom

Cons

  • I'd have to start wearing suits and a chauffeur cap

  • The carpool line would be a bitch because I'd have to stand outside the car with my hands crossed in front of my crotch and my feet shoulder width apart while waiting to open the door for my kids

  • It would be nearly impossible to use the not-enough-room excuse for getting out of driving other kids home from events

Photo Credit: https://www.royalaustin.com/limo-101/limo-riding-etiquette-for-kids/